In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
