Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Just pee around me
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize