What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
