You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
