you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
