sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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