Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize