So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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