At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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