hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
