It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize