sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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