..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
