i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
why does every cop we meet know your name?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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