This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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