Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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