chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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