so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
