Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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