season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
