bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
