the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
the day after is always just damage control
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize