I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
