Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
you win again, gameday.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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