I just cut my nipple shaving
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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