so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize