yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
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she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
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Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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