I look better un-naked...
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Randomize
