I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
