I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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