She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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