I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
