the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
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