What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
