come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
There's even glitter on my cock...
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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