I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Randomize
