saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
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