I'm passing your future prison.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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