i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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