so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
