1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
