I need to stop coming to work sober
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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