love makes seman taste better
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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