I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
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