needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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