i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
