is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
