with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
