I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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