I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
