So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
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we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
You need Xanax blowdarts
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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