my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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