she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
